Confidence: Either we have it or we don't!

Confidence is a skill that most of us lag and constantly look upon and ask for advice as to how to build it. Confidence is not something that arrives to us at the time of birth but it is a skill that can be developed through intentional and purposeful practice.

Here's how:

Often if we feel afraid, or defeated we get smaller in our bodies, and whenever we feel pride we get bigger. One of the key tip for becoming confident is to look confident. Looking confident in all aspects matters. 

1) Act like a winner and not a loser. 

We are going to talk about our outside in.

This tip is all about our body language which is our outside in. 

When you walk into a networking event or office do you act and look like a winner?

To become confident we need to look confident by showing it in our body language. The most easiest way to look like a winner is to claim our territory, own our body, and own the space around us by standing or sitting tall. Keep your arms loose by the side, open your chest wide, hold your head high, relax your shoulders and keep them broad. Never turtle your shoulders down to your ears, never bend your chin to the chest in a slouched position as this may signal defeat. 

We have also seen that whenever we have to answer a call or talk to someone, we do that half- heartedly. There is not a smile on our face. We are not quite willing to take that up. But always remember that one of the key points to become confident is to be happy while talking. Speaking confidently.

2) Be happy while talking

We make our first impression with our Hello upon answering a phone call. Always answer a call in a happy Hello as this depicts your confidence to the receiver at the other end. This indicates that we are a confident speaker who is happy, joyful and willing to talk. Crack out some jokes to fill in your conversation with happiness.

3) Happiness and confidence go hand in hand. 

We should have meaningfulness in our job. We should show our willingness and a wanting to do something.

To always remain happy at work:

 - first find out your company mission

 - write your own personal mission statement,

 - make a success folder on your computer and whenever you feel low or get a doubt on yourself, just take a glance at the success folder to know your worth. This will make you even more confident of your value.

Often when we are called up on the stage on an event, we are always in a rush to get off. This is a sign that shows the audience that we lack confidence. We should walk confidently.

4) Be more relaxed while walking.

Suppose you are receiving an honor or talking to someone, never be in a hurry of walking away. Always walk slowly, patiently and calmly and look interested in the other person. 

We all know that it is easier to get the right thing by emulating or watching someone. In a similar way confidence is easier to develop when we can watch and emulate someone.

5) Find a confident role model: 

Look for a role model who embodies the following qualities:

• Shows confidence and leadership
• Isn't afraid to be unique
• Communicates and interacts with everyone
• Shows respect and concern for everyone they meet.
• Is knowledgeable and well rounded
• Has humility and shows willingness to admit mistakes
• Does good things outside the job.

If someone embodies all these qualities then he/she is the ideal person who can help you in improving and developing your leadership confidence.

6) Pump up your confidence : Listen to something that makes you confident and pumps up your energy.

When we experience exhaustion our confidence tends to dip. Make different kinds of confidence playlists to keep your spirit alive.

Talk to someone who makes you realize about your worth and value. 

Often we feel that we are undeserving for a prize or honor, and we start getting a doubt over ourselves. This is the most common sign of skepticism.

7) Overcome imposter syndrome:

Imposter syndrome is a Psychological phenomenon that causes smart, talented people to feel like a fraud, to feel undeserving of their accomplishments.

Please keep in mind that this is not a defect. It is not a personality trait, but it is a reaction to an event. We only have to try constantly to overcome imposter syndrome and lead a confident life.

Having a trust on ourselves that we are going to be able to do something effectively is best sign of faith and sparking confidence in our brain.

8) Focus on self truth and make your thoughts more productive.  

Never let yourself feel that you are worthless, remind yourself of the amazing accolades you have brought to your company. Trust your instincts at all times and fill yourself up with something productive.

9) Limit social media consumption : Time you spent in social media should be balanced by the real social interaction.

Social media helps to stay connected and informed but it is also important to find a balance between reality and fantasy. According to many interviews, social media has had a bad effects on people's relationship. It has impacted their self esteem in a negative way and many were deceived by other people. These sites may dip our confidence, so we should never let ourselves get addicted with these social sites. 

These are some of the ways by which we can up our confidence and evolve as more confident individuals